they're not gonna get me.
they just aren't going to get me.i'm not going to let them get to me.

i normally fake laughter.my laughter today?horrible even for my fake laughter.
i had a straight face pretty much all day.
mike didn't even say goodbye to me when he left
and meagan was pretty much the only person who cheered me all day.
that and trevor.
slightly.
things are so weird latley.it's like i'm sharing my mind with another person..someone who i don't know at all..do i want to know who she is?
do i want to got here?
seems i have to.
i'm hiding too much,and it's manifesting myself again.

fuck.just let me fucking go..someone just say its okay if i go...
somewhere where no one knows my name,where i can start over,
be forgotten...where i won't have to feel a thing..the possibility of not existing at all anymore doesn't scare me, i won't be able to realize i'm not in existance,now will i. i cant hold it up.i've tried,and i've failed.
so that's where we are.
i can't die,i'd hurt too many people.i'll admit im not loved by a lot of people,but the ones who do would do anything for me.i wouldn't risk them for my own gain...
but fuck...
medically induced comas sound like fun...
doris dying,i might be fucking pregnant by someone who hates me,i dont know if i can tell meagan what i plan to do about it because i can't fucking lose her i just fucking cant i still dont think im gonna survive it once they tell me dori's gone,i've only got two months or less with her...my sister...my love...her and meagan,my loves...i just want to latch ahold of meagan and tell her everything...but i cant trust people anymore.i'm keeping everyone at a healthy distance.they don't need to know my emotions,emotion for me would only be a weakness...robot drone mode again...once upon a time someome told me they'd never let me go back to that...well where the fuck is he now?doesnt matter.

her favorite song is playing and im starting to smile
when i was ripping out my hair before this and lets just say i can hardly open my eyes because theyre bloodshot and swollen...for once,they're not fucking bleeding...
i have to make it through this for her.
i know it's her im meant to be with.
suddenly i see,this is what i wanna be,suddenly i see,how the hell it means so much to me...
at least make it through to robot mode...
this is definetly the hardest period of my life to date
pregnancy,losing dori,losing..nevermind...
im going to die through childbirth,that i already know
im not sure if i am or not yet
but i might have to abort it because i'd die during childbirth,i'm not healthy enough. not that death is such a baaad thing.
but dori...
i can;t lose her at all costs...but what the fuck can you do to prevent a fuckign stomach cancer...is there such a way?she's only fucking got two months..two fucking months..two...that could never be long enough.never.not for my sister.i'll never be able to meet her now.well...at least i'll always have her letters...make me laugh in my darkest hours...i've already proven that.
but if these things do happen..im latching on to meagan if she hasn;t realized what a waste of time i am by then.
wow.yeah.what the fuck happened to thinking positive..
ill wake up tomorrow and put myself straight.
if i live negative ill never survive this.not a fucking chance
so i'm on a low again.so fucking shoot me,i'd enjoy it
but i've got people.and they're gonna help me through this...
fuck.im starting to twitch.panick attack time.
they wind up going into seizures sometimes..well this should be fun,no one's fucking home but me.meh.fuck it.
i don't belong,so i'll make my fucking place
i belong with her
i'm fucking determined and if i'm determined,i can fucking do t his
so im going to fucking do this
at least until dori's gone...then..i dont know what i'll do.
but whatever it is,i'll make sure everyone's safe to avoid all pricey consequences.

HI GUYS
BACK TO HAPPINESS
I APOLOGIZE FOR MY EARLIER MORBIDITY
chris is coming tomorrow
and maybe nigel if he can,or wants to
lower note..dori had surgery last night and was dead for a few minutes...
but she's alright...omg..i wouldve died if she wasnt man
shes one of the most important people in my life
like rosie.always there.never criticizes unless its to help me out.
always brings me back to my senses and makes me laugh.
but back to high since im trying tobe positive
hehehe...new happy kick :) makes me healthier supposedly
andi dont want to remember my life as depressing
i want to remember myself as the girl that fell
but got back up no matter what,so i'd never let anyone down.
i hate letting people down,lol.
OMFG EVEN HAPPIER KAYLA!*bounces around and does the robot*
I GOT DORI INTO NIGHTWISH!!
YAAAY SOMEONE ELSE TO SHARE MY PSYCHO TARJA OBSESSION WITH!!
most of my friends hate her voice or are afraid of the music rofl
even though TARJA QUIT WAAAAH
moving on...
i got a pile of brushes today...
so im gonna start designing my site
stupid procrestination...
im thinking,instead of piczo,i could do it on freewebs this time
more chalenging,more impressive and slightly more professional.
well i love you all
and i cant wait to see everyone tomorrow.
especially if nigel comes.im gonna hug him hardcore.i miss him.
OMFG COOKIES!!*eats more*
stupid add,i came online for a nightwish tab..meh.
im prolly not even gonna get it now lol
well,improvisation on guitar is quite fun
even if i suck miserably,but its cool
practice makes perfect.
i can play again,my arm is revived
W00000TTT!!!
oh and i checked out apile of bands todya...
descriptions to come later,
but so far i adore the band valencia
and be your own pet is fucked up..lawl
anyways... you all cheer the fuck up
or i will get you
...somehow.kinda hard to get matt cause he lives in japan..and idk where the fuck the rest of you live besides erix,nigel and rosie lol
i should get dori to make a livejournal..
anyways.before i get MORE fuckin distracted
i love you all,toodaloo.

hey guys...
gonna kill some people
and someone who i was best friends with last year is one of them
carla...
i didnt think she'd hurt me
i've always been a good friend to her..
like...im always there to help her
and i have,quite a bit
but a pile of people were backtalking to me
and she was there
and did she defend me or at least tell them to shut up?
no...
i would've said something for her..
cause that's who i am
and everything they said..
it basically confirmed everything i thought about myself
i dont want to talk about that...but yeah..
my self esteem already blows...
and now its even worse..
and yeah..
im gonna go...
bye bye guys...

well.things are slightly odd lately
but pretty good
i dont have secrets anymore
and i'm learning to deal with myself.
thanks nigel :D
doris starting to make sense
im just my screwed up self with a screwed up haircut lol
and yeah thats prettty much it
im out.cheers.

someone tell me why i'm sof ucking lucky.
id ont deserve him.goddamnit i love him
i told him.i told him..quite a bit
and did he run?no.did he even care?
no.
he told me he loved me now.and he didnt care about what happened.
ive longed to hear those words my whole life
i love him goddamnit i love him
more then anything immaginable anything in the world
he's the other half of my fucking soul
i dont feel alive without him
goddamnit i hate being dependant on people but i know i can always depend on him being here...because he loves me back
someone finally loves me back the way i love them.
goddamnit i love him
this is all so surreal
that he wouldnt run away
that he doesnt think any less of me
that he doesnt blame me
i love him.
and i always will.
and i'd die for him
goddamnit nigel i fucking love you.

dori called me at like ten thirty last night
and said she was freaking out on my answering machine
and i didnt know it was her cause i didnt hear the message...
im scared
she better be ok
-freaks out-
yermmhmmm
:'(

i got a new gf today!:)
we were like...hardcore flirting with eachother all day..
imma whore,i know
so is she,in her own words
yay the whores unite
the sadistic whores,cause we're both psychotic and evil...
her name is meagan :)
yeah.
so im pretty happy about that :)
but jake yelled at me for like an hour...
and i got angry...
and now im angry
and im angry to the point i mentally cracked,feel like getting physically sick,freaking the fuck out...
:'(
im hurt..and im so damn cold...
im on mental break mode
and yeah...
so im gonna go...

̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao RUM HATES YOU
Chr!s says:
yeah i nkow
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
PUNCHLINE KICKS ASS...well..some songs
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
fool.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
the rum is a backstabbing horrid friend to have
Chr!s says:
CHILL OUT SO I CAN EAT MY PIZZA!
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
you should ditch it..for..for for for....VEX
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NO NEVER
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NO PIZZA FOR YOU
Chr!s says:
vex is for girlygirls
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ANNOYING YOU is my job
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HEY IT TASTES GOOD FAG
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jhahaha i called you a fag
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
hehhehe
Chr!s says:
i'm not the one drinking girlygirl drinks
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HEY!
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
laura bought it NOT ME
Chr!s says:
go perm your hair
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HELL NO
Chr!s says:
princess
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im too emo for that shit
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
FUCK MAN THATS NOT COOL
Chr!s says:
having some tequila rose too?
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
no never tasted it
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
stfu,meanu
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
meany*
Chr!s says:
yeah right
Chr!s says:
lol
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HMMPH!
Chr!s says:
put some ice cream in your vex
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im gonna go listen to the spice girls..NOT
Chr!s says:
it'll taste prettier
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
...your an ass
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
you know that?BIG MEANY ASS
Chr!s says:
nyahahahhaa
Chr!s says:
i feed off your resent.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
BIG MEANY DRUNKEN HUNGOVER FAGGOT ASS
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
fine.
Chr!s says:
(like most big brothers)
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jackass.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
meany
Chr!s says:

̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU MADE ME EMO
Chr!s says:
I made you punk
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU MAKE ME CRY AT NIGHT
Chr!s says:
emotions made you emo
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im not punk dufus
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao
Chr!s says:
you were
Chr!s says:
almost
Chr!s says:
at one point
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
i was never really punk
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
BUT I WAS EMO ON THE INSIDE
Chr!s says:
well i tried ok?
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:

̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NOT HARD ENOUGH
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ahahahah FAILLURE
Chr!s says:
typical emo attitude
Chr!s says:
I'm all your fault
Chr!s says:
take responsibility you damn emo kids
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
hmmmph!!!
Chr!s says:
it's YOUR fault you live in the dark and listen to whiny teenage boys who can't handle their feelings
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NEVAAAA
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
..who says they're all BOYS?!?!?!
Chr!s says:
hehehehhee
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ever heard of paramore????!??!?!?
Chr!s says:
n
Chr!s says:
o
Chr!s says:
I like the distillers
Chr!s says:
but unlike you
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
i do too
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
sometimes
Chr!s says:
they are PUNK
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
depends on what song
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
the voice irritates me sometimes
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YEAH!?!??! well i like the yeah yeah yeahs and Rilo Kiley
Chr!s says:
'cause it's not pretty enough for you emo princesses
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jackass.
Chr!s says:
don't type too fast you'll knock off the pink frilly keyboard cover and then you'll have to type on the harsh, plastic keys
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU SHOULD...GO DRINK MORE RUM TILL YOU FALL INTO AN ALCOHOLIC HAZE AND THEN GET ALCOHOL POISONING AND FALL INTO A COMA
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao JACKASS
Chr!s says:
out >> p i z z a
Chr!s says:
And i will never get alcohol poisonning. I am a barroom hero
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
DAMN YOU
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao RUM HATES YOU
Chr!s says:
yeah i nkow
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
PUNCHLINE KICKS ASS...well..some songs
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
fool.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
the rum is a backstabbing horrid friend to have
Chr!s says:
CHILL OUT SO I CAN EAT MY PIZZA!
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
you should ditch it..for..for for for....VEX
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NO NEVER
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NO PIZZA FOR YOU
Chr!s says:
vex is for girlygirls
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ANNOYING YOU is my job
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HEY IT TASTES GOOD FAG
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jhahaha i called you a fag
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
hehhehe
Chr!s says:
i'm not the one drinking girlygirl drinks
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HEY!
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
laura bought it NOT ME
Chr!s says:
go perm your hair
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HELL NO
Chr!s says:
princess
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im too emo for that shit
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
FUCK MAN THATS NOT COOL
Chr!s says:
having some tequila rose too?
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
no never tasted it
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
stfu,meanu
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
meany*
Chr!s says:
yeah right
Chr!s says:
lol
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
HMMPH!
Chr!s says:
put some ice cream in your vex
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im gonna go listen to the spice girls..NOT
Chr!s says:
it'll taste prettier
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
...your an ass
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
you know that?BIG MEANY ASS
Chr!s says:
nyahahahhaa
Chr!s says:
i feed off your resent.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
BIG MEANY DRUNKEN HUNGOVER FAGGOT ASS
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
fine.
Chr!s says:
(like most big brothers)
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jackass.
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
meany
Chr!s says:

̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU MADE ME EMO
Chr!s says:
I made you punk
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU MAKE ME CRY AT NIGHT
Chr!s says:
emotions made you emo
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
im not punk dufus
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao
Chr!s says:
you were
Chr!s says:
almost
Chr!s says:
at one point
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
i was never really punk
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
BUT I WAS EMO ON THE INSIDE
Chr!s says:
well i tried ok?
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:

̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NOT HARD ENOUGH
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ahahahah FAILLURE
Chr!s says:
typical emo attitude
Chr!s says:
I'm all your fault
Chr!s says:
take responsibility you damn emo kids
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
hmmmph!!!
Chr!s says:
it's YOUR fault you live in the dark and listen to whiny teenage boys who can't handle their feelings
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
NEVAAAA
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
..who says they're all BOYS?!?!?!
Chr!s says:
hehehehhee
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
ever heard of paramore????!??!?!?
Chr!s says:
n
Chr!s says:
o
Chr!s says:
I like the distillers
Chr!s says:
but unlike you
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
i do too
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
sometimes
Chr!s says:
they are PUNK
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
depends on what song
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
the voice irritates me sometimes
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YEAH!?!??! well i like the yeah yeah yeahs and Rilo Kiley
Chr!s says:
'cause it's not pretty enough for you emo princesses
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
jackass.
Chr!s says:
don't type too fast you'll knock off the pink frilly keyboard cover and then you'll have to type on the harsh, plastic keys
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
YOU SHOULD...GO DRINK MORE RUM TILL YOU FALL INTO AN ALCOHOLIC HAZE AND THEN GET ALCOHOL POISONING AND FALL INTO A COMA
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
lmfao JACKASS
Chr!s says:
out >> p i z z a
Chr!s says:
And i will never get alcohol poisonning. I am a barroom hero
̸Ҳ̸ҳ̸Ҳ[[-ωσυℓ∂ уσυ ∂ιє тσиιgнт fσя ℓσνє؟вαву ًσιи мє ιи ∂єαтн...][тнιѕ ℓιfє αιи'т ωσятн ℓινιиg][ISABEL]ROSE says:
DAMN YOU

fucking hearbreaker.they're all fucking heartbreakers.world's out to fuckign kill me.they know it.i know it.everyone knows.i'm not strong enough to hold my own.i just lie to everyone and tell them i am.nance just gave up on me.good for you,you don't need my problems.you don't need me dragging you down.i'm doomed to die alone,and it doesn't fucking matter.i don't know what to do.there's nothing i can do.the world hates me and i hate it back.i'm better off dead.the world is better off without me.why can't theya ll fucking realize that.i don't know why they won't just listen.i don't have anything left to fucking give.i don't have anywhere else to run or hide.i can't face myself head on,can i?i'm just dying.they all knew i was going to die.they knew they were oging to lsoe me.so what.they;re fucking right i can't stand this anymore.i can't stand myself.i'll just kill everyone else as i kill myself...but i can;t stop it.i can't fucking stop fate.i can;t stop who i am.i can't stop me.i'm just a fucking monster..i'm losing control over myself again...slowly..but noneoftheless.and it doesn't matter.last time i lost control was when i thought i lost it all.i guess i still had something left to lose.so now i've got nothing.and it doesn't matter.i was always doomed to self destruct,now is just my time.so i'm sorry for whoever the hell i'm hurting...but you'll all be fine.you're all stronger than me.no one can help me,i'm a lsot cause.i don't matter.i'm jusy another human in the world.there's others.go love them.cause no one loves me.they may say they do.but they all lie.i've learned that well enough over the years..and it doesn't matter.i'll always love them.but they'll never love me.i'm unloveable.i'm a machine with no beating heart,no flowing blood...cold,dark steel.emotion bounces right off of me.no one can love me.itd oesn't matter.life support keeps me alive..time to sever the fucking tie.it doesn't matter.nothing matters.this is me finally admitting that i,a very strong person apparently,is too fucking week to hold on to the broken strings keeping me together.i can;t hold myself together.i'm too much of a fucking mess.and i don't care.i've got no remorse.they all took the risk when they decided to become my friend...they knew what was coming to them.so what does it matter now...nothing matters now,i'm all alone,and i always will be.i dont'[f ucking care.my life is a lie.
who am i kidding,making stupid promises i'll never be able to keep?
i can't put all this back in place.
i just can't stand the fact that all i ever believed about myself is true.
but i guess that doesn't matter,does it?
i'm dying.and this time..it's for good.
bye bye,beautiful...
doesn't matter.i've tried to end it all before.i never cut deep enough,didn't tie the noose well enough,didn't swallow down enough pills,tried to shoot an empty gun.i'll go join joe in death.he's the only one who ever really loved me.he's the only one who ever really knew me.could see through my five year old eyes.could see all that ian did to me.could see all that my dad was doing to me.could see all that my mom was doing to me.could see that even though i was only five that i was headed for a long life of misery.and he told me.he told me he didn't think i'd make it.and me,being a suicidalf ucking five year old,i fucking agreed with him.i couldn't take my fucking stepdad beating me,my fucking dad hating me and my fucking mom hurting me emotionally.i grew up with cruel words and cruel blows.i've dealt with hell.and i'm still dealing.i can;t escape those words and those blows.it made me who i am.and who i am?is nothing.
nothing more than a pure illusion.i'm less than what you think.i'm less than what you can all see...i put on an act to make you all believe in me.to believe in who i used to be,when really,i'm nothing.
i've always been nothing.time to sever the ties,live and let die.
so you can all live...but it's my time to die.